these have been collected over the past year or so, on irc and aol and whereever else.

greg, a person's importance is inversely relative to the amount of keys that they carry

<.gregory_box> wondrously beautiful and ceaselessly nice dreams for tonight and everynight... sweetsweetdreams of the nightbeach

<.greg_box> sleep well and dream of meadows with adverbial proverbial serbian renassaince butterflies

<.gregory_box> sweet dreams
<.gregory_box> of
<.gregory_box> piers
<.gregory_box> and
<.gregory_box> docks
<.gregory_box> and
<.gregory_box> tomatoes as ships


<.Schroder> r
<.Schroder> ah
<.Schroder> there it is
<.Schroder> someone was taking it's time
<.lindsaybits> er.....iain, you're personifying letters
<.mary_whitehouse_experience> iain your r is lagged
* mary_whitehouse_experience pings iain's r
<.Schroder> yeah
<.Schroder> my r's is lagged
<.Schroder> HAAHAAHAAHAA
<.Schroder> HAAHAAHAA
<.Schroder> H
<.Schroder> a....
<.Schroder> sorry

<.Schroder_> /me pulls off all of lindsays clothes and fucks her senseless

sug og svelg. ha en god helg
suck and swallow. have a nice weekend.

<.eman`> iain it's ok i have something here for you!!!!
<.Dust-Junky> ohhhh
<.eman`> its.....
<.Dust-Junky> what
<.Dust-Junky> a short lycra skirt?
<.eman`> Dermot the infALAtable love sheep

<.jonpie> i don't smoke. unless i'm on fire, in which case i can't help it.

<.milkshake`> yay for blur!
<.Dust-Junky> *ARSE*
<.milkshake`> i beg your pardon?

Swifty009: i may have a hernia, and i may have a backache, and i may
be tall and stupid and ugly, and i
may not know who ykw is...BUT I GOT A WEE.

<.ashestoashes> you know someone has problems when she's dating siren`s leftovers.

<.milkshake`> hes a little theiving turd person

<.dandese> you are so full of wee linds
<.dandese> you are so full of cardy
<.dandese> I can't stand your up to the brim cardiness

<.dandese> a piece of rich-pie
<.dandese> linds got some quality play from richness

<.markchapman> iain, that was a misunderstanding
<.markchapman> and you know that fine
<.markchapman> i just had very itchy underwear
<.markchapman> and i decided that i simply had to remove it
<.markchapman> in the middle of the main street
<.markchapman> it's not my fault there were so many curious people about
<.Dust-Junky> you didn't have to stick it in someones face shouting "Look, it's nice, it's just covered in scabs"
<.Dust-Junky> and then chasing them down the street might have been a bit much

<.mr_rich> and my testicle is still aching

<.dj_swifty> OH MY GOD
<.dj_swifty> THAT WAS VULGAR
<.dj_swifty> (ahaa ahaa)

<.jonturnip> you went naked?
<.jonturnip> apart from the clothes, i mean

<.subfarm> it's like "jesus christ, where the fuck is my hand?"
<.subfarm> it done did disappeared!
<.subfarm> then you're like "oh, right, THERE it is"

<.comfortablyindifferent> yeah her mom asked me if i was was a friend of Elmo's and i was like
<.comfortablyindifferent> yeah
<.comfortablyindifferent> uh-huh

<.karin_greg> iain, you sardonic wit-bucket, you

<.princess-christina> daddy just said, "what do you mean when you say word?"
<.princess-christina> "it sounds like you are agreeing with me, but i really don't get it"

430. been involved in the use of a penis as a leash or bludgeoning device?

>>>>Whats my worst? the glimmer in your eye when i can tell you and lindsay are about to pinch me

<.gregory_stanley> ewan looks like a braided penis in it

<.jongoose> how are you my wee little peach of fruitiness?

<.rich`> ive just been assaulted with fuckign chicken dippers
<.rich`> my brother is a fucking freakboy
<.rich`> ive got bits of batter in my ear!

<.jinpee> i'm more bored than a bored person who has just been on a "how to be bored" course and been taught how to be bored by mr. boring with his very best in boring teaching skills

<.grapejcplus> you look like you could be jonny greenwood's sister lindsay woohoo!

<.chia> richy the woman wanker?

<.jinpee> oh darling
<.jinpee> let's make love

* letdown_bitch comes up behind rich with a butcher knife... stabs repeatedly

<.mr_rich> im ogign to go and get a drink now
<.mr_rich> and when i get back
<.mr_rich> everything will be nice and normal and un-confusing
<.XiBe> plom
<.mr_rich> and in no way surreal

* Skeeter----- slaps florence_y`all around a bit with a large trout
* florence_y`all marvels at skeeter's originality

* greg_box used to slum it with the individually wrapped cheese slices, but they were skanky

<.karinKarinNo> 4 buttocks

<.dj_bits> bite me
<.jinpeeeee> NIP

<.jinpee> was that you that just caused me do come hurtling down the stairs with my shorts around my ankles?

<.schmoko> Lindsay has tourettes of the keyboard

<.jinpeeeee> i might have to neuter you.

Richy91600: you could lose a fucking ANIMAL in there!
Richy91600: help! mum! i lost me whale!
Richy91600: oh, there it is

<.cactua`> I know for a fact that if ryan were a girl there'd be all sorts going up there
<.cactua`> most of it wouldn't come back

<.Skeeter--> hello
<.rich`> you trouser enthusiast
<.Skeeter--> what ?
<.rich`> you heard!
<.Skeeter--> what does that mean ?
<.rich`> what do you take me for? some kind of nutstop? dont play stupid with me!
<.Skeeter--> what does that stand for, I don't get your usage of words
<.rich`> you fucking prefect

* rich` walks sexily down a school hallway

* rich` suddenly gains the demeanour of a sailor working on the perfume counter at debanhams
<.rich`> err

<.uncle_matthew> jonpie has the WEIGHT ADVANTAGE
<.uncle_matthew> oh
<.uncle_matthew> he's crying now
<.uncle_matthew> and pointing with fat, creamy fingers

<.schmoko> yeah, #radiohead is notorious for it's awful retro hair cuts

* jubilee- kicks bingo-master in the soul

<.schmoko> what about this? "the silk like bubbles, of the undoing of peasent filth,
<.schmoko> gaj
<.schmoko> meverlafdkj;lsafdkja;dsfljefsa;lfdsaj;fdsaljkfdsa;plfdsj
<.schmoko> I was going to say something
<.schmoko> and I was going to delete it
<.schmoko> but I hit enter
<.schmoko> there is nothing worse then hitting the wrong key
<.schmoko> well
<.schmoko> national socialism
<.schmoko> but other then that

<.jubilee-infinity> i think my eyeball just fell out

<.jubilee-infinity> ok i need my eye back, time to go!
* dj_tits keeps it
* jubilee-infinity puts an oversized grape into her eye socket
<.jubilee-infinity> FINE KEEP IT SEE IF I CARE
<.jubilee-infinity> oh, i just can't help myself
* jubilee-infinity goes to eat the grape but eats her good eye by accident
<.jubilee-infinity> what the fuck?
<.jubilee-infinity> good night!!

<.cacktua`> I stapled my shirt to an invoice today
<.cacktua`> how productive

<.jubilee-> thom is such a boring cack sometimes

<.jonpie> holy shit, i just heard the BIGGEST bang from brain's room
<.jonpie> he's probably knocked his wardrobe onto his face

platyjon: tell him
platyjon: he's a donkey raping shiteater

<.juxt> healthy men spuge relatively inhertly tasting spermies

<.iamnotavegetabarker> jism?
<.iamnotavegetabarker> he used that word?
<.iamnotavegetabarker> he is such a fat bastard

Richy91600: i even do a lou bega role-play session for £150 a night

<.katiesp> shut up!
<.katiesp> beeoth!

<.cactua`> oh right I see
<.cactua`> what happens when I get the horn?
<.jonpie> i run away
<.jonpie> I RUN
<.cactua`> good plan
<.jonpie> in case you mistake me for grade a rump.

<.jubilee-> i like penis
<.jubilee-> that was mike
<.jubilee-> he likes penis, apparently.

<.jubilee-> i constantly talk in my sheep

<.^stewart> i know tai jit fu!
<.^stewart> it's the ancient japanese art of putting random words together,screaming them and running at someone


<.schmoko> you should make your thesis "the unfair discrimination and persecution that women suffer in today's education field is so tremendously awful that most women can no longer write more then five pages without devolving into utter nonsense"
<.schmoko> and then prove your thesis by filling the next five pages with "blah blah blah blah"

Iikeikeike: naughtynaughtynaughtynaughtynaughtynaughtynaughty woolen virus!!

schmoko: the next millenium will have a fat jesus on their crucifixes

schmoko: /me gives lindsay several weeks backlog of sweet loving at one time, crippling many parts of her for the rest of her life

Richy91600: 'ok, well, how'd you want me?'
'well, would you mind shoving this here eel up yourself?'
'no! not at all!'
*squelch*





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